Just a rant, but with a happy ending...

Some days are really hard on me...my patience gets tested to the limits.  Today was one of those days.  I had to be at work early this morning, which meant getting all the kids up and out the door when we typically wouldn't have had to.  Work went just fine, and I even got out of there a little earlier than I'd thought.  I was dragging though, so came directly home to just chill on the couch as the kids watched a movie.  Then, up and out the door again hoping to get some grocery shopping done.  But after I got into town, I had to turn right back around to help my brother return a truck that he'd borrowed while his was in the shop.  Okay, got him where he needed to go, and then headed to Walmart again.  As soon as I got in the store, Jamie called me.  I couldn't talk and shop and keep my eyes on 5 kids at the same time (I like to call myself SuperMom, but it just wasn't gonna happen this time).  I pass the phone to the girls so they could talk to their dad.  I start browsing some of the clearance racks when we see a close friend of ours.  So, I get rid of Jamie on the phone, and chat with our friend for a bit.  After that, as now the kids are getting restless, I go back to my browsing.  Levi decides he's done sitting in the basket.  He starts whining, and I give him my purse to hold to pacify him...but that lasts for maybe 2 minutes.  He wants up.  I don't like to give into fits that my kids throw.  Of course, that's pretty much impossible to prevent when you are in public.  You wouldn't believe the stares I get anyway because I have all my kids with me.  I mean, come on, I can't be the only person in this town with 5 kids, right?  But you'd think I was by the stares I receive.  I try, and almost always, succeed in having my kids behave themselves, especially when we're in a public place.  Lily's heard this phrase a million times from me, "We're not the only ones here.  You need to be respectful to others."  I feel like that's part of my job in raising my kids.  Anyway, Levi was crying, and not getting his way, so he turned up the volume.  I give in...for one reason, and only one reason...because I was trying to be respectful of others.  I know other people don't want to listen to my child cry, but come on, do they really have to glare at me???  They don't just glare at me, but then move their eyes to each one of my kids:  Lily biting her nails, Jasmine messing with an item on the shelf, Rosalie playing hopscotch on the tiles, and Iris singing very loudly, plus Levi crying.  I'm told often by strangers, "You're brave."  "You've got your hands full."  "Are you the baby-sitter?"  "Are they all yours?"  You can imagine what I'd like to say to them, but my dad raised me better than that, and I just smile and give a polite response and go about my way.  I happen to view ALL of my kids as they are: an absolute blessing!  I'm sorry for those that see them any other way.  I find great joy in being their mom...the good times and the trying times.  I ended up cutting my shopping trip short.  We didn't even make it to the grocery side but to get some laundry detergent.  And Levi knew he'd got his way.  As we walked away from the checker, Levi stopped his fit, and was just fine.  I didn't want that because it means I'll have a repeat from him the next time we go to the store.  At home he knows when I put him in his play-pen or in his crib, he's going to stay there until I get him out.  He starts fussing sometimes, but knows I'm not going to give-in to him at the house.  The girls all learned this too.  That's why we don't have issues at bedtime, dinner time, or whatever.  They know when we say something, we mean it.  I wish others believed the same.  If they did, they wouldn't judge me as a bad parent because I'm not bending over backwards to please my child.

Okay, now for the happy ending...although my trip to the store was very frustrating and embarrassing, I wouldn't have any other "job" in the world.  It's not the easiest job, but can come with the most rewards if you work hard at it.  Nothing gives me more joy than being a mom.  On the way home, I was thinking about how the evening would end.  I needed to do something to turn it around.  ***DEEP BREATH IN***  I decided to stop and rent a movie, pick up dinner since I didn't buy any groceries, and spend the evening enjoying my kids.  First thing they said when we got home (even though they knew I was still upset) was, "Thanks for getting us a movie, Mom.  Sorry we didn't act good at the store."  We hung out in the living room, ate dinner picnic-style, and watched a movie together.  Then off to bed for my 5 happy little ones. 

I'm reminded that even though I know I'm doing a good job, I too will have days like today.  But I believe so much in the importance of one's attitude.  Your attitude can change any situation.  You can choose the ending.  I want my kids to grow up feeling loved.  I feel like they already do.  I'm very blessed and fortunate to get to stay home and take care of my family.  I couldn't imagine working a job that took me away from them.  So, I guess I will happily look forward to my next "pull-my-hair-out" trip to the store with my kids...(yes, I do plan to take all of them so people can gawk and stare at my family). 

Oh, and I want to include the picture I took Monday evening.  I was just coming in from the east side of Dallas making my way home.  Beautiful work of God's hand...

Toothless and Halloween 2009

Sorry I haven't posted in a while, but a lot has gone on.  Not getting into all of it, Jamie is working again, and things are looking up.  I've been in awe of God's provision while he was out of work.  He's always been faithful to provide.  Thank you to our friends and family who continued to keep us in your prayers and loved us when we really needed it.

I have another little one losing her teeth.  Jasmine woke up one morning excitingly announcing that she had a loose tooth.  That evening at dinner, it was clear to me that the tooth had probably been loose for a few days and needed to come out.  So I did what my dad used to do for us...I grabbed the dental floss, and tied it under the tooth, and cut the nerve.  Jasmine was squirming and whining with her eyes closed as I held her tooth in my hand.  I told her, "I'm done.  Here's your tooth.  See, that didn't hurt, did it?"  She was very surprised, and said, "No, it didn't hurt!  I lost a tooth!"  We don't do the tooth fairy thing at my house.  I give the kids a dollar, and they get to keep their tooth.  Below is a picture of Jasmine with her tooth and "compensation."

If you've read my blog before, you know that we don't do anything for Halloween.  This year was no different then the previous years for me.  Of course, the kids notice Halloween is creeping with the items popping up at the stores and tv shows being geared for the holiday.  I'd promised the kids that I'd get them a treat, and they could wear some of their dress up clothes that day, but that's all I'd planned.  One day we had to run to Walmart for Jamie to get something.  Just he ran into the store as the rest of us sat in the suburban.  He returned with a pumpkin.  The kids were so excited.  I told him if he wanted to carve that with the kids that it would be his project.  A couple of days later, I went ahead and picked up two more pumpkins so they could all experience pumpkin carving.  Jamie told me he'd never carved a pumpkin before.  He cut a hole in the top of each one, and I got the girls started on cleaning out the insides.  But Jamie so conveniently disappeared for this part.  Because the girls couldn't get everything out (they were literally taking out each seed individually), I ended up getting stuck with cleaning 3 pumpkins.  Then Jamie magically showed back up.  He told the girls that he'd do a cat...and he did a really good job on it.  I then drew a silly face on the next pumpkin, and Lily & Jasmine drew the face on the last pumpkin.  Lily wanted eyelashes on her pumpkin, so I cut some out of felt for her.  I don't know why, but she said it looked like a bride to her.  So, I grabbed some scraps out of my craft supplies, and made (a very pathetic looking) veil for their pumpkin.  Then I had to make a bow tie for the other pumpkin...

...And our finished product was a Goofy Groom...a Blinking Bride...and their Kitty.

I'd already bought the kids more than enough candy.  I didn't plan to take them trick or treating at all.  But Jamie had talked to my dad early that day, and my dad invited us over for dinner. Jamie decided we could take the girls to the houses on my parents street.  I pulled out some costumes from earlier years, and we managed to get them dressed up.  I didn't dress Levi, though.  But I did manage to get a shot of him enjoying a Kit Kat that I'd gave him...

And here's my attempts to get pictures of the girls in their costumes.  I wanted to take the pictures outside, but that ended up being a bad idea.  One of the neighbor's kids was outside playing with his basket ball.  He noticed the girls and was hollering at them from across the street, "Hey! Are you going trick or treating?  Where are you going?"  I couldn't get all of them to look my direction...until the last picture in which you can tell they were ready to be done with pictures.

We made our way to my parents house, and took the girls down their street to trick or treat.  I was a bit disappointed because there was only about a dozen houses handing out candy.  The girls didn't mind though...they didn't know what to expect. 

When we got back to my parents house, we ate dinner, and then the girls got to help their grandma hand out candy to other trick-or-treaters.  They had so much fun.  And their grandma had a little pumpkin for each of them and a pez dispenser.  They kept saying, "This is the best Halloween ever!"  I'm glad that it all feel into place like it did.  It was a lot better than what I'd had planned.  I'll end this with a few pics of Levi with his pumpkin, and the jack-o-lanterns that the kids grandparents had carved.

Lots to report...

I'll start with the most recent. Thursday, Iris turned 3. She was so excited. I'd told her a few weeks ago that her birthday was coming, and her response was, "It is!?! I'm gonna be free {three}, and I'm gonna have a burger with cheese and pickles!" I said, "You want me to make you cheese burgers?" She said, "Yeah! With pickles!" She doesn't like pickles. In fact, when we get a happy meal, she always tells me, "Mom, I said NO PICKLES!" But having another birthday...getting so big and going to be three...she decided she was ready to eat pickles on her burgers like her older sisters.

Her and I made the trip to the store. She got to pick out her presents. She probably pushed every button and knob within her view (thankfully she's not taller, or we would have been there a lot longer that we were). She'd decided on a few items, when of course nature called. We made our way across the store to the bathroom. On the way back to the toys, we walked through the shoe department. She said, "Oh, I want shoes too." So, we looked and she spotted the cutest red boots. We found her size, and she couldn't wait to get home to wear them. We also picked out a few outfits to match her new red boots.

Here's Iris in one of her new outfits with her red boots.

Here's Iris enjoying her cheese burger...minus the pickles. She asked for a slice of pickle while I was putting her burger together, and was quickly reminded that she doesn't like pickles. So much for that...

Iris got to pick out her candles. They were shaped like cupcakes. And she also got to help decorate her cake.

Here she is blowing out her candles...

...and here she is taking off the candles and licking the frosting off them.

We couldn't feed the cake fast enough to Levi. I don't think he even chewed it between bites. Look at how wide he's opening his mouth!

Here's Iris showing some of the items she got for her birthday.

She's so cute. I guess I should have cleaned the frosting off her mouth before taking pictures, but it's still a sweet pic of my baby girl.

On a different note, Jamie's been home a lot lately. Work has really slowed down. I'm faithful that God will provide a job soon. He's been so good to us, and His provision is more than we can ever imagine. I've been going though so much, but am reminded daily of how big God is and how He's always faithful to work things out. I'm thankful and embrace these times because I come out of them with more faith, understanding, and a knowledge of God.

My sister, Jessica, was able to come visit us last month. Her time here was way too short. I wish she lived closer. She's one of my best friends, and time spent with her is always wonderful. The kids had so much fun having her here too. It was nice that they had their energy focused toward her (I got a bit of a break). Here's a few pictures of her visit with us. There's so many more that I wanted to post, but I've limited to some of the best.

Me, Jessica, James and Ashley

Ashley and Jessica with Levi

James and Jessica

Jessica managed to get a cute pic with almost all of my kiddos

Jasmine, Iris (so funny), and Rosalie

Jessica and Lily

Jessica with our dad

Jessica and I

Jessica, Me, our dad, and James

Okay, the next two pictures are of a "rug" that my step mom, Janee', painted on their back patio. Another beautiful creation by her. This one, of course, is so special to me. It has all my my kids foot prints. Iris and Levi alternate in the black, and then Lily, Jasmine, and Rosalie's prints alternate in the red.

And to finish this post, here's a picture of my guys. Levi and Jamie playing the piano. Levi just loves the piano. He really focuses on hitting the keys...not just banging his hands on them to make noise.

I love my kids...

Another funny thing happened that I just had to share. Jamie was on the way home, and I'd told the girls that I'd like for them to clean their room before their dad got here. Lily got started right away cleaning the bathroom, and then when she was done she moved to her room to work on it. With exception to Lily, the girls drag out the chore of cleaning their room on every occasion. It's always a struggle to get them to do it. One day I got so fed up with the mess that I emptied their room. I removed everything but their beds. But that's a post for another day. One of the ways I motivate them to clean is to give them a quarter for each chore. They all have a piggy bank, and love to get to put money into it. So, eventually all the girls made their way to the room today, and started to clean it up for their quarter. I happened to be walking past, and they had a mess of their shoes in the hallway. So, I tell Rosalie to tackle the shoes. It should have only taken her 5 minutes, so I walked away expecting her to do it. I never went back to double check. They ended up getting the room cleaned (so they told me), we ate dinner, and then I told Lily to get me my change jar so they could get their quarters. Rosalie came with her hand out, and I asked, "You got the shoes put up like I asked you to, right?" Her response is the reason I'm writing this post. Rosalie said, "Well, my heart...my heart told me to play." Jamie and I looked at each other, and I ask, "What?" She says again, "My heart told me to play to me. But I didn't want to. But my heart told me to play." To make sure that I fully understood her, I ask, "So, you didn't pick up the shoes? You played while your sisters cleaned?" With her eyes wide open, she says, "I'll do it right now." And off she went to go pick up the shoes. She returned within minutes. She'd said she had cleaned up the shoes, and I ask, "What about your bed? If you didn't help with the room, did you make your bed like I'd asked?" She said, "I will! Right now...right NOW!" And she ran off to do that too.

Oh, that child makes me laugh so much. She expresses her feelings a lot by how her heart "feels." If you hurt her feelings, the response you can expect is "You made my heart melt" or "My heart is breaking." We do a lot of talking with our kids, so when something is on their mind they don't really have a problem explaining to us what's bugging them. I like having that relationship with them, and also like the way they are able to express themselves.

Our most recent happenings...

I've been taking it easy this week. I had to have my wisdom teeth out. I've been avoiding it as long as I can, but it caught up with me. I'm recovering just fine. I'm ready to get off the pain medication. I don't take medicine, so if I am on it you can bet I'm hurting. I'm getting off of it just as soon as I can tolerate the pain.

We took the kids to the Sciport in Shreveport last Sunday. We got to see everything that the museum had to offer, plus the kids got to go to the IMAX for the first time. They really had a lot of fun. I'm not a big fan of science museums for my own reasons, but they do offer an opportunity for the kids to enjoy the hands-on displays. I just wanted to share a few pictures from our day.

This is Lily at the "Head on a platter" exhibit. You can tell she really got into it.

Rosalie and Iris enjoying the view from a tree house.

The girls playing the big piano together.

Okay...these next two pictures are so funny. Jamie brought a fan into the travel trailer to get the air moving. The girls were walking past it, and letting the breeze from the fan catch their dresses or shirts, and then they started sticking their face in the fan. They were cracking up in laughter. It doesn't take much to entertain us. I (of course) couldn't resist snapping a couple of pictures of the girls getting blown away.

And finally, it's official...we're not just crawling anymore, but now have added climbing and cruising. Levi figured out that he can walk without holding onto something. He's been taking steps for a while, but just one or two at a time, and then drop to the floor to crawl. I'd left the kids a few times at my parents house when I'd had my dentist appointments recently. My dad has been devoted to getting Levi to walk, and because of my folks, he's finally doing it all on his own. It's so sweet. He'll walk across the room to whoever and ready for a big hug for his accomplishment. I used to sit him on the couch to keep him contained, but that's no longer an option for me because he's now realized that he can climb too.

Just a funny moment from my day...

We're potty training Iris. It's taking longer than it should because of all the traveling we've been doing this year. She's grasped the concept, just hasn't mastered the technique. I told her that I'm not going to buy her any more pull-ups, which she's fine with that...she prefers panties. So, today, I got her to put some on after church. She was hanging out with me in the living room, and disappeared for a minute. She shows back up and says, "Mom, I peed in your room." So, I send her to the bathroom to clean herself up, and also tell her that since she made a mess in my room that she was going to have to clean it. I grabbed the carpet cleaner and a rag. Iris meets back up with me, and tells me that she needs a wet wipe to clean her mess. I told her that she'd use the rag. I tell her to show me where she went so she can clean it. She led the way almost kind of proud of herself. "Okay, mom...it's over here." She's walking along and says again, "It's this way. Over here. Here it is!" Our carpet in the bedroom is dark, and I couldn't see a spot. I said, "Are you sure? Where did you go?" She excitedly answers, "Right here...on your shoe!" And she sure did. She peed right on my black leather boots. Then I understand why she said she needed a wet wipe. I still made her clean it up (and then I went back and cleaned it myself to make sure it was done right). Just another day in the adventure of potty training. I'm just glad she told me. No telling when I would have found that little present if she would have hid it from me.

Splish! Splash!

I have a bunch of pictures of the girls in the tub when they were smaller. But I don't have any of Levi. So this morning when I gave him his bath, I snapped a few. He loves taking a bath. He squeals with excitement as I run the bath water. He bounces next to tub as he watches it fill up. And from the time his feet hit the water until I get him out, those hands are moving non-stop slapping the water and splashing it everywhere. He doesn't care at all if it gets in his face. Every now and then, he pauses to wipes his eyes, and then gets back to throwing water all over the place. So, here's my pictures that I took. Just a few...I had to put my camera away to keep it from getting wet.

All Dolled Up

Very rarely do I get to put on my make up without an audience. Even if I have my door closed, one of the girls manage to make the discovery that "mom is putting on her make up." This morning was like any other. Before I even got the zipper open on my make up bag, Jasmine was behind me saying, "Mom, can I have lipstick?" To her surprise, I said yes. Her face lit up, and she grinned ear to ear. "Can I have the purple one?" This is her favorite lipstick in my bag. I give it to her, and Rosalie and Iris came wanting a shade for themselves as well. "Can I have lips too?" Iris asked. I love listening to Iris and her cute way of communicating. So, the three of them got to put on lipstick. I couldn't resist snapping a few pictures of my girls.

I remember being little and watching my mom get ready. I never got to play in her make up, though. I certainly don't let them do this every day, but let them do it enough to keep them from getting into my make up when I'm not around. My mom passed away when I was 11. One of my memories of her is simple and plain, just being there watching her put on her make up. I want my girls to remember the simple day to day things. I was watching them putting on the lipstick, being so steady and careful not to make a mess. I'm going to miss that when they get bigger. Just writing this makes me tear up. One of my greatest joys in life is, without a doubt, being a mom to my kids. Nothing will ever replace that. God has blessed me so richly, and for that I am thankful.

So, parents out there that work so hard to keep your kids out of your make up, that cabinet of pots and pans, or from pulling every book out of the book shelf, surprise them one day and let them do it. You won't regret the memory that each of you are making.